Are you a Lion? :P

Sometimes I get really interesting emails from my wela colleagues. Here is one I got last week, apparently this gentleman has nothing better to do :D. I wonder how do software houses in karachi and islamabad determine this same thing? Enjoy ;)

Here is how software houses in Lahore determine if you are a lion, a cat or a goat?
Techlogix Method:
Call a Lion for interview and tell him you are a CAT…. then call for another interview… then another and another, the Lion dies before Joining in confusion of being a CAT

NetSol Method:
Hire a Lion… Make him wear a Big Ugly ID Card, put him PowerBuilder,
Give him NO Internet and no increment for a long time.
The Lion will die in Isolation and Poverty…..

Then hire more lions….. and repeat the process

Systems Method:
Hire a Cat …
Tell him to work late and even on weekends…assure him that he will eventually become a Lion once he reaches onsite…..and make sure that he never reaches onsite.

Cat dies in hope of becoming a Lion….

CureMD Method:
Hire a cat……give him salary of cat and work load of lion…
Tell him that he will get an increment and a promotion at the quarter end..
When the quarter ends and cat becomes a lion…give him “big loss” notice

The cat dies of frustration…

PalmChip Method:
Hire a lion??? No Cat, tell him he is a lion, give him some weird protocol to work on, tell him if he remains alive while doing it, he will get a promotion.

The Lion Dies in Fear.

Mentor Graphics Method
Hire a lion and ask him to meow like a cat…
he will die eventually of frustration…

Mobilink Method:
Hire a Cat; give him a salary of a Lion…
Give him work of 3 Lions…..transfer him to customer care.
he will die receiving stupid calls all day……..!!!!

LoanStar Method:
Hire a lion, give him a salary of a cat…
the lion dies of hunger and frustration

Innovative Method:
hire ..sorry….purchase a lion …
change his timings…(instead of 9 AM …change it to 7:30 AM )
cut down his allowance…….. make him do a lot of documentation
lion dies from fear of becoming CAT…..

Xavor Method:
Hire a Goat, Make him realize he is a Lion, Give him lot of work, give him short deadlines.

Goat Dies of Strain

8 Comments so far

  1. xen (unregistered) on February 10th, 2006 @ 5:55 am

    lion, goat, cat? wtf is this a zoo or something?

  2. Yasir (unregistered) on February 10th, 2006 @ 9:25 am

    Nah, I don’t like the story. Doesn’t it happen that cat eventually becomes a roaring lion and takes over the management? I’m specifically talking about CureMD cats.
    Nevertheless, a good insight. (Not about Lahore’s IT firms, but cats and lions. Oh, goats too! :D )

  3. tanzila (unregistered) on February 10th, 2006 @ 11:11 am

    side-splitting funny and it just doesnt apply to softwaree houses, it applies to almost all corporate organizations – in parts and streaks. What one becomes towards the end is the donkey who is chasing the pay check danggled infront of one like a carrot.

  4. Abbas H. (unregistered) on February 10th, 2006 @ 9:20 pm

    How does this have anything to do with Lahore? I thought the whole point of Metroblogging was to blog about the city.

  5. Yasir (unregistered) on February 10th, 2006 @ 9:59 pm

    Abbas, it is about Lahore as far as I know. It doesn’t have to have word Lahore in every post, does it?

  6. Ramla A. (unregistered) on February 10th, 2006 @ 11:56 pm

    LOL. this is so funny. Tanzila’s right. A bit of each kind of corporation profiled. Something for almost anyone to relate to here.
    Long live philosophical corporate welas!

  7. PooPoo Head (unregistered) on February 11th, 2006 @ 3:31 am

    Only people who could understand and laugh are those who have actually worked in those s/w houses. Atleast it was true for Netsols :-)

  8. Abbas H. (unregistered) on February 12th, 2006 @ 3:53 am

    Might as well start considering this an “email forwards blog archive” then.

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