Accidents, a lesson?

On the evening of LMB meet up, i.e. last Saturday, I got involved in a motor vehicle accident. I was driving the car with my sister on the passenger side. I was the first one on stop line, we were talking and she was showing me something, but I was more attentive to the count, it was on 2 and then I hit the gear. While we were chatting, I saw this white car approaching stop line in a single glance from corner of my eye, the stop signal must have blazed, but he ran stop sign as he was running in high gear to get across, for fraction of a second, I thought that he is going to stomped on the brakes, but he did not and in the blink of an eye his car was in front of mine, and BAM. I smacked into that car and both of the cars came to a halt. Ok, this all was so nerve breaking that I was unable to speak for a few seconds. accident_final.jpgAll I could hear was a male voice (who was riding a motorbike beside my car), stating “Aap ke ghalti nahi hai” (its not your fault), that was a traumatic situation and I was unable to figure out what actually happened with me, my sister started yelling at that guy and we both pulled over on the right side, disrupting the traffic that got stunned. The driver of that Alto was a young boy of 18-20 years, there was an elderly man on the passenger side, looked like his father and at the back seat there was a teenage boy and a middle-aged woman, probably his mother. My sister was having argument with him and he was blaming it all to me and was not even accepting that it was his fault (the usual Lahoree scene).

I took the car out of gear and stepped out, with thumping heart, to see how badly it got impacted, OK, the headlight was safe, fine, but left front bumper crashed in, the indicator totally smashed, number plate was in semi-rolled position, I felt a bit relieved. While I was going back, the constable approached us with a slow and steady gait, stating, “iss ke ghalti hai” (its his fault). He asked him to show his license and though I was in a shock, I asked the constable to let him go, “iss ko janay dain, koi baat nahi.” Constable said, “Aap jayein main daikh laita hon.” My sister started arguing with me, WHY you are sparing him, he should compensate for the damage or at least accept his mistake and I was like, “chor do”, just let him go.

The real story began, my sister got quite upset, she was adamant that I should have stopped there and asked him to pay off for what he did. She wanted me to charge him for the damage and to teach him a lesson so he will never repeat this kind of carelessness again. Let me debunk my points;

a. I did not want to get into argument and want to avoid creating nuisance for that party, who has not enough brains (he looked like a villager, a kid with sweating all over his face and anxious looks, obviously weaker).

b. I thought because she had scolded him enough, and possibly, the constable might have charged him after we left, there was no more room left fore MORE lesson.

c. Situations like these are the exam, of our patience, power that God gave us, the knowledge and understanding we acquire about life and people with time or wisdom, practicing religion, decision making with righteousness and things like that.

d. Not much of a disaster?, so lets get back to home and offer dow nafal for shukrana.

e. Thanks to God, that he did not slam into the passenger side leaving my sister injured.

I must relate what Momekh wrote few days back about our society and tolerance, a very well-written post though he talked about opinions. I thought that I can afford the damage, not a big deal and not a big blow, OK, so why should I ask him for money, just to teach him a lesson, who am I to teach him a lesson, just because I got power?, I think he already got enough of it. Let me tell you guys that two years back, I bumped into a car and that both of us were doing a wrong thing. Anyways, the couple was quite old, and when signal was about to turn red, uncle stopped the car just after the stop line, near the middle of the crossing and, I was, obviously the one, who was in high speed, and BANG. Now, the constable did not charge me, rather said with a smile to the couple, “agar nikal jatay tu accident na hota” (they used to spent most of the time in USA and I think they might be having some argument about getting across). The old people started bullying with a low tone, but they were quite nice and it was not a big damage, but I said that I will pay for it. Later, I found them to be quite RICH….and I thought they could have spared me too, u know, they were elders, more wise but they did not, because they wanted to teach me a lesson, which I learned (always keep the distance).

So the conclusion to my understanding is that if we want to become a stable and harmonious society, in excited state of mind, we have to find a better way out for both the parties involved, tolerance is the key factor, if its about opinions, don’t become indifferent, and if the damage is so little that you can easily afford, then all you should do is to let go i.e. “darguzar” (this conclusion does not necessarily apply to all the situations because there are fair chances that if I will have ten accidents in a row, I would not deal, with same level of tolerance). Again, tolerance is the key to a better solution.

Don’t forget safe driving practices.

4 Comments so far

  1. Faraz (unregistered) on August 19th, 2007 @ 2:27 pm

    good post… we need tolerance and common sense in our society. so often people get into serious argumentation and more for such small things.

    the other party was obviously at fault, but the accident itself plus the money it will take for them to repair their car is already a good enough lesson for them to drive better going forward. what you did was right. why prolong the issue when it can be avoided, specially when no big damage was done.

    btw: i hope your sports car is alright :)

  2. binary-zero (unregistered) on August 19th, 2007 @ 11:02 pm

    always wear seat belts – don’t know even though we are literate but ignores a simple fact of seat belts being saviour of human life.

  3. Pretty Simple (unregistered) on August 20th, 2007 @ 1:28 am

    @Faraz: My sports car is ok.

    @BZ: I know very well after a torn tendon and deshaped bonnet, seatbelt is a must :D

    I hope other’s will learn a lesson.

  4. me3 (unregistered) on August 21st, 2007 @ 1:12 pm

    Thank you for posting such a good example of tolerance. You are right, people don’t stop to think that this is a test of your tolerance by Allah. I am sure yes you suffered at monetary discomfort in fixing the damage, but do realize that Allah will give you back in ten fold, when you most need it! Stay safe and be thankful of Allah.

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